Project: Christmas Warmth

The last couple of weeks here in Thailand have been busy.  A lot of changes, and transitions, and things happening.  

November 18 my friend, Lindsey arrived from Arkansas.  She will be living in Thailand with me until September.  It's so wonderful to have a friend here.  A person to laugh with, and work with, and adventure with.  Lindsey and I both worked with YWAM in Oxford, New Zealand.  I was in Oxford in 2006 and the beginning of 2007, Lindsey was there 2007-2009.  So although we've been in contact for 4 years, this is our first time working together.  It's been great and I'm excited she's here for the year!

We also had a World Race team living with us for the month of November.  The squad was split into smaller teams to work with the different ministries of Lighthouse in Action.  I had one girl who came out with me to the red light district a few nights a week to work with the kids.  Hannah and I would teach english, play games, and sing with the kids.  It was such a fun month! I was blessed to have a person working with me that was just as crazy, and fun as I am! And she connected with the kids so well!

This past month has been focused on connecting with the kids.  I have been told that last year in the red light district there were upwards of 20 kids that sold flowers in the streets every night.  The past month I've never seen more than 3 or 4 in one night.  Because of this we've gotten to connect with each kid much more.  We know what each of them like to do.  We've been able to work with them one on one and really get to know them.  This turned out to be a huge blessing as we prepared for Project: Christmas Warmth.

Project: Christmas Warmth was started in 2011 by my friend, Bethsaida.  She saw needs the kids had, and she prayed that God would provide to meet those needs - and He did! Nights in Thai winters get very cold - as cold as 30 degrees fahrenheit.  Many of the kids selling flowers in the street don't have warm clothes, or adequate shoes.  With donations from people at home we were able to raise enough money to bless each of the kids that we've been working with, with GOOD quality gifts.  For each of the kids we were able to get nice warm shoes, jeans, track pants, t-shirts, hoodies, backpacks, a toy, and for each kid something they enjoy.  Whether it was a book, sketchbooks, clay, crayons, notebooks - just something that they love.  

A couple of days ago we went to the red light to hand the gifts out to the kids.  They were so excited! Later in the night we saw one of the boys and he had already put on his new shoes.  He reminded us with a smile that we didn't get him socks, and asked if we would bring him some so his shoes wouldn't smell bad.

I have socks in my backpack to hand out tonight :)

If you would like to see the video we put together of Project: Christmas Warmth 2012 you may click here.

It was great to see that just by spending some quality time with each of the kids every week I've been able to connect with them and know each of their personalities.  And my Thai is getting a little better - I can even have simple conversations with them now :)

Thank you each for your encouragement, support, and willingness to stay connected! 

Seeking Perspective

I’m already entering week three of this giant adventure.  This last week has been more difficult than the previous. I was sick for several days with a head cold.  A head cold with vengeance... 48 hours of not getting out of bed, and close to a week of not leaving the house.  It left me feeling a bit disconnected from the work I have to do here.  Along with feeling disconnected from my work here, I was also feeling a bit disconnected from home.  The time difference along with not feeling well, and busy schedules made it difficult to connect with friends or family for several days.  I found myself in my house in Chiang Mai sick, lonely, and struggling to keep perspective.  

It’s moments like this it would be wonderful to say, “God squashed all discouragement I was feeling and I spent the week full of His joy.”  But instead I allowed myself to get in my head a bit.  If any of you watched the video I posted on my YouTube channel ‘Questions and Answers’, a friend of mine asked: 

“What is something you and God are still working on as you get ready to go.”

My Answer:

“Working on me trusting totally in Him, and not trying to think through everything in my head because thinking about what I’m doing can be really overwhelming and make me feel like I’m not ready.  But in the small moments when I DO trust totally in Him I know that it’s going to be ok... So just living completely in faith and not thinking to much about what I’m doing”

I’m still working on it.  This past week was a week I can learn from.  I tried to think to much through what I’m doing.  I tried to figure it out.  And do you know what trying to figure everything out accomplished?  Nothing.  It just caused me to feel anxiety.  Because I couldn’t figure it out!  And I couldn’t figure it out, because I’m realizing that God wants to work through this His own way  - which isn’t logical.  I want to understand the timing, and the finances, and the details.  

He wants me to listen to His still small voice and be obedient one step at a time.

It’s realizing that victory here looks different from victory at home.  It’s realizing that He didn’t ask me to sell everything I own to stay away for only a couple of months.  It’s realizing that He didn’t call me into a season of faith, so that He could see me struggle.  It’s realizing that He’s faithful, and if He’s asking me to living financially by faith that He’s going to provide.  It’s realizing that when things seem hard, I need to seek Him and not try to figure it out on my own.  It’s realizing that going to the market and have a short simple conversation in Thai, and bringing food back home is successful. It’s realizing that it’s ok to celebrate those success’ as insignificant as they may seem!

And most of those were not great epiphanies in the night.  They weren’t me overcoming fear, or discouragement in a single moment.  They were reminders, encouragements, and wise words from friends.  They were seeking scripture and reading Truth.

Last night I was finally able to go back to the red light district to work with the kids for the first time in almost a week.  As I sat across from a little 6 year old girl and taught her English I saw her face light up.  As we began learning animals, I watched her laugh as she imitated the animal sounds.  As we fashioned letters and small animals out of clay she began to play.  For a moment she was able to be a kid.  She wasn’t selling roses in the streets of the red light district for an hour.  She was being 6 years old.  When it was time to go she thanked us, and as they walked down the street she turned back looking at us with a smile and waved.

Being with those kids, I’m able to get out of my head and trust in God.  Because there’s no logical reason that I am making a difference in these kids lives.  I feel totally inadequate.  Completely inept. I was reminded this week that it’s ok to feel like that — because it’s NOT about me.  I’m going to be reminding myself of that a lot in the coming weeks and months.  

This past week I read a verse 2 Corinthians 3:5-6 “Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think any thing as of ourselves; but our sufficiency is of God; Who hath made us able ministers of the new testament; not of the letter, but of the spirit: for the letter killeth, but the spirit giveth life.”

When you look at the context of this verse the word sufficient means having the ability or competency to do a thing.  Able means to make sufficient or to equip with adequacy. Ministers are servants, people who follow the orders of another.  

So this verse is telling us that we do not have the ability of competency to do things ourselves, but our ability and competency comes from God.  God has made us sufficient and adequate to serve others and follow His orders.

This means if I am being obedient to Him that my adequacy, and ability to reach out and show His love comes straight from Him.  I can’t do it in my own will. That kind of takes all of the pressure off.  All I have to do is listen.

I realized this morning that things are going to be hard.  This is going to be an uphill battle to be obedient, at least in this season. But God has asked me to follow through with the simplest task I've ever had.   And that simplicity has somehow made it difficult.  The only thing that God is asking me to do is show His love to these kids.  That's it. Allowing them to experience the characteristics of His nature that they have never experienced before.  The characteristics that He's pointed out to me are loyalty, trustworthiness, and consistency.  And I'm not willing to be a person who proves to these kids that they can not trust, that they will always face broken loyalty, or that they will never have consistency in their little lives.   If He's calling me to display this to them I must be willing to be obedient.  To operate solely in His power, and not in my own strength.

When I posted my Facebook status yesterday and said, “...I wonder what I will learn today.”  I didn’t think that it was going to be quite this deep.

“Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again — rejoice!”  Philippians 4:4

The Only Thing Predictable is that it's Unpredictable

Hello everyone!

This week I was able to start working - and I just jumped right in. Sunday night a World Race team arrived.  35 people were on the squad that came in, and they were split into teams to work in different areas of Lighthouse in Action. I don't know a lot about World Race, but if you're interested in finding out more you can check out their website here: www.theworldrace.org I have a group of 7 living with me that will focus on working with Love Acts in the red light district, and with kids in the slums.  

The core purpose of Love Acts - showing the love of Jesus through actions.

Working with the team, getting them moved into my house, and figuring out what my ministry times were going to look like - along with language lessons, and graphic design work in the afternoons created a busy week for me.  Tuesday I celebrated my 26th birthday in Thailand.  Complete with coffee, Thai lessons, dinner with new friends, FaceTiming with friends from home, and a birthday cake.  It was a good day :) 

Wednesday night I was able to go out with Bethsaida again to the red-light district to work with the kids.  When we meet with the kids we pick a spot that has decent lighting in front of a store, or business that's closed for the night.  When we arrived on Wednesday we found that in the spot we had chosen the week before a new bar had opened up, and there was no place for us to meet with the kids.  As we walked down the street, we found a new spot, and we sat and waited. After half an hour of sitting, no kids had come down the street. Eventually we looked up and saw one of the boys we had spent time with last week walking down the street.  He came running over and sat with us for a few minutes, excitedly asking if it was time for gifts yet because he wanted shoes.  Looking down, he walks the streets with bare feet every night.  We explained we would have them in three weeks, and he smiled and wanted to learn more letters and animals in English.


Wednesday night that one little boy is the only kid we saw. As we were walking back to our bikes Bethsaida looked over and said, "The only thing that's predictable about this work, is that it's unpredictable." And I was starting to understand what she meant by that.

Thursday night we were back out in the red-light waiting for more kids.  This time it was almost an hour that went by until we saw one little girl come around the corner with her mom.  She came running over and sat with us, excited to learn.  As I taught her the alphabet, Bethsaida began talk to the girls mom.  After they left it was almost 11pm.  Bethsaida had found out that the boys she had connected with, whom we hadn't seen, had been moved to sell flowers in a different area, but she wasn't sure where.  We decided to try and go find the boys to reconnect with them.  We searched for quite awhile, but weren't able to find them last night.

So this is what my ministry is looking like at the moment. It's not looking for spectacular things.  It's allowing the love of Jesus to shine into a kids life - even if it's just one kid when I go out.  It's still worth it.  As I prepare to go out tonight - thankful that my cold is on the mend, and that it's not raining - I can only pray that God brings the kids that need it the most today.  And maybe even leads me to find the boys that have been moved.  

Consistent, Loyal, Trustworthy.

I have now settled into my house, and began getting into a routine.  It is starting to become real that Thailand will be home for awhile.

Last Monday I moved into my house.  I live in a small neighborhood about a 15 min drive from the red light where i will be working with the street kids, and about a 20 min drive from Wongen Cafe, which is my office in the afternoons :)

For the last week I have been living in the house by myself. It has 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, a living room, dining room, and kitchen.  In 2 weeks my friend Lindsey will be moving to Thailand for the year, and will be my roommate. The two extra rooms will be used to host short term teams that come through to work with Lighthouse in Action.

My cute little house in Chiang Mai :)

A look down my street on my walk home.

My little work corner.  Makes me feel right at home :)

Tomorrow afternoon a team of 7 people from World Race will be coming to stay with me for the month. Each of them will be helping me work with the kids ministry during their time here. I'm so excited that there will be other people living with me from now on :)

Last Thursday was my first chance to work with the street kids in the red light. I am so excited for the work I will be doing here. One of the girls who had been working in the red light the past year, Bethsaida, will be transitioning out of the kids ministry as she prepares to move back home, and I will be transitioning in.  For the first few weeks I'm here she will be working in the red light with me and introducing me to the kids. God showed her the need in the red light for these kids.  She went in not knowing any Thai, by herself, and just began loving on them. The kids work every night in the red light selling roses. It's forced labor. They have to work on the streets every night until early hours of the morning sometimes with no shoes, and inadequate clothes.  She brought games, books, and candy so the kids could come rest, and play when they got a break. She began teaching them English - and simply building relationships and loving on them.

The ministry is so simple, but so vital. To be the consistent, loyal, trustworthy love of Jesus in these kids chaotic lives.

 He has THE sweetest heart. I loved hanging out with him!

These two boys loved playing!

She is SO smart! She loves learning English! 

Last Christmas Bethsaida bought clothes and shoes for all the kids she met. This opened up a huge door in these kids lives. She took the opportunity to meet a need in these kids lives and practically show them love. She called this act Project Warmth. December-February can be quite cold at night so providing the kids with warm clothes and shoes broke down a lot of walls.

So this year we are doing the same thing. December 3 we will be handing gifts out to all of the kids.  Even though it's for Christmas, this is when it gets cold. There's no point in them waiting to be warm. We are wanting to raise money to sponsor 25 kids to get them warm clothes and new shoes.  This will cost approximately $25 per child.

If you're interested in donating to Project Warmth, you can click here.  All donations will go directly to purchasing shoes and clothes for the kids. I will be posting pictures and videos of project warmth as they become available. If you have any questions feel free to email me at kristenwilkes.design@gmail.com

So that is my focus as the moment - along with learning Thai :) I love what I'm doing here and I'm really excited for you all to have a chance to connect with these kids and the work that God is doing as I build relationships here.

For now, it is time for me to go and pick up my bike that I will be renting for the month so I don't have to walk everywhere anymore. Thank you Jesus :)

Settling In

Day 5 here in Thailand, and I'm starting to feel like I could be processing the fact that I'm living here.  Yesterday I was able to meet some of the people that I will be working with, and get an idea of what life will be like here in Thailand. 

In the afternoon I went up to Wongen Cafe, which is run by Lighthouse in Action.  It is a coffee shop/cafe selling espresso drinks, smoothies, meals, and desserts.  I sat and was able to meet some of whom I will be working with as well as go through orientation over Thai culture, and the different areas of Lighthouse in Action.

I learned that... I have a lot to learn.

My main focus at the moment is going to be learning the Thai language.  I will be having Thai lessons one on one 3 days a week, 2 hours a day.  This will give me the ability, obviously, to communicate more effectively with Thai people, but also give me more freedom in living here.  At the moment it is difficult to communicate or know what anything is when I'm out on my own.  Most Thai people know basic english, but it's really difficult to function in society with no ability to speak past basic numbers and greetings.

Aside from my 6 hours of one on one Thai lessons through out the week, I will be focusing my days on working in Wongen.  I won't necessarily be making coffee or serving food (although my years of restaurant/Starbucks experience have prepared me to help in those areas if needed...) but I will have the chance to be around Thai people, practice my language skills, and listening and learning while I'm there.  

One of the amazing things I learned yesterday was that one of the big needs right now is a graphic designer.  Just so happens that I graduated with a degree in graphic design last year :)  So while I'm working at the cafe I can spend time working on graphic design projects for Lighthouse in Action.  Promotional Materials, branding of Wongen, as well as some photography for the website. It's so great to know that the years of hard work that I put in, in school will be put to great use :)

Aside from my days of helping out with design and learning Thai, my focus within Lighthouse in Action will be working with kids.  I will have the opportunity to work in the slums a couple of nights a week with kids there.  I will be partnering with Compassion International who sponsors kids in these slums.  Building relationships with the kids and reaching out to them.  

I will also have the chance to reach out the street kids in the Red Light district. The street kids don't have much.  There are no sponsorships for them, and they work into early morning hours every night on the streets of the red light district selling roses.  These kids are owned by street parents who don't allow them to return home until they've sold their roses. I will be working alongside one of the girls who has built relationships and trust with these kids to start out.  My goal - simply to show them the love of God.  My nights may look like sitting in one area for the night and allowing the kids to come over when they have a break to play a game, or get some food.  To have the opportunity to pray over them.  For them to see some consistency and love in a chaotic existence. 

Right before I left home I was sitting with a friend of mine and I was saying that I was afraid I wouldn't be able to reach the Thai kids because I couldn't speak their language.  My friend has two boys who are 5 and 3, and I spent a lot of time with their family in the months before I left. She reminded me that her boys love me - and most of the time I'm just laughing with them.  There aren't in depth conversations, or a lot of spoken communication. I started to pay attention to my interactions with them in the last few days I was home.  The day before I left I spent a good portion of my morning playing with her three year old.  We didn't talk at all, we jumped over lines in the floor, and laughed.  I love that God has created me to work most effectively not in the business realm, not in a 9-5 atmosphere... He created me to play.  To hang out with kids and show them the love of Jesus by laughing with them, or smiling at them, or playing with them.  That I can do.  I'm actually good at it.

Aside from learning what my days will look like here, I was also able to move into my house yesterday.  I will be living here with my friend Lindsey, when she arrives at the end of November.  We will also host teams that come through to work with Lighthouse in Action short term.  The first team will be arriving in 5 days.  It is a World Race team of 35 people, who will be working in several different areas of Lighthouse in Action.  The 7 people who will focus on working with kids will be living at my house with me, and going into the slums and to work with street kids.

I honestly have no idea what to expect since I haven't even been into the slums, or to meet the street kids yet.  I think I'm just going to have to jump in, and figure it out as I go.

Now that I am all unpacked, 8 days after leaving home,  I am starting to feel more settled.  I'm just looking forward to feeling like I know what I'm doing :)  I may not have a set routine, but now that I've heard what I'll be doing - I am excited to experience it.  To live it. For it to be my life here.

I have so much to learn. So much.  But I'm here, and I'm diving in.  And it's good.

My First Thailand Experiences

It's my third day here in Thailand.  Yesterday was my first real day going out and seeing the country, and the culture.  When I woke up in the morning and got ready for the day, I went to the outdoor sitting area and made myself some coffee while I read through the book of 2 Corinthians.  

This is the outdoor sitting area at the guesthouse I'm staying at for the weekend.

Feeling encouraged after spending some time in the Word I tried to muster up the courage to go out and find some food. At this point I had been in Thailand for a day, but because I slept for 17 hours I had seen nothing, still had no idea where I was, and I had very little food and water left with me. I made sure I had everything I needed in my bag and trekked out into the streets of Chiang Mai in search of food.

I managed to find a store and get some carrots and plenty of water, and then stopped at a street vendor to get some lunch.  Some chicken wings, they were actually really good! And not as creepy looking in person as they appear to be in this photo...

First street vendor food... And it did not make me sick. Only tasted delicious.

After lunch the two girls who had come to let me in the day I arrived came over to check on me.  Their names are Lisa and Caroline, and they are both from Washington DC.  They came to work in Thailand for the next couple of months, and it looks like I'll have the chance to work with them while I'm here.  We went and got shrimp Pad Thai for lunch, and then went to the mall to pick up a few things we needed.  I was able to get a phone so I'm able to communicate with the people I'm working with in Thailand, and that also makes it much less scary to be walking around trying to find things in Chiang Mai, because I know if I get lost I can call someone for help.  

I came back home to rest before going to dinner with Bethsaida.  Her and I had emailed a couple of times while I was still in Michigan.  She is from New York, and has been the director of the LoveActs ministry with Lighthouse in Action for the past year. She recently stepped down, and will be getting ready to move out of Thailand soon - but it was great to get some insight from her and talk through how the ministry has been running recently.  

We actually went to a Mexican Karaoke Bar in Thailand.

You didn't see that coming did you.

So while you were all eating breakfast Saturday morning, I was eating chicken enchiladas, and singing Karaoke with new friends :)

When I got back home last night, I realized I had survived my first real day in Thailand.  Even though I'm still living in this big house by myself - I don't have any anxiety about going to get lunch from the street vendors today.  I feel like I know my way around a bit.  I'm REALLY excited for all of the staff to get back so that I can be around people, but... this is going to be good.

I decided to take the day today to just relax here at the guesthouse.  No big excursions, or adventures. I'm going to walk up and get some lunch, and then spend my day reading, napping, and enjoying some down time before the staff get back and I start working.  This week I will start Thai lessons, I'll be going into the red light district to meet the kids I'll be working with, and the women, and I'll start to get an idea of what my routine will be here.

Thank you all SO much for your prayers, your support, and your encouragement! This is definitely the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, but I'm really excited to see how it's going to be used!

Later today I will have another video posted on my youtube.  Click Here if you're interested in checking it out!

And this is me in the Shanghai airport after I got my passport stamped in China. After that long 14 hour flight...

What Day is it Again?

I'm here! I made it... I'm in Thailand! And not just in Thailand, but I actually made it to the Lighthouse in Action base :) I arrived in Chiang Mai almost 24 hours ago.  The latter part of my journey was quite stressful.  I was tired emotionally, mentally, and physically. 

I was supposed to be picked up in Bangkok and have a place to stay for 12 hours so that I could rest, and get some sleep before coming to Chiang Mai, but no one picked me up.  My flight had landed in Bangkok at midnight - so I stayed in the airport. When the ticket windows opened at 5am I paid a small fee to have my flight moved up.  Instead of leaving at 5pm I would be able to leave an noon and go on standby for two earlier flights at 8am and 10am - but both of those flights were full.

When I realized that they had forgotten to pick me up in Bangkok my exhaustion and emotions took over.  I had just traveled for 26 straight hours not sleeping for more than an hour at a time on the plane. I tried calling the place I was supposed to say and got a hold of someone, but when they tried to give me directions that were in Thai I didn't understand, and I didn't want to get lost in Bangkok at  midnight by myself.  So I sat in the airport, and I cried.  How was I going to do this if I couldn't even figure out how to get to where I was staying from the airport? How am I going to LIVE here.  I wasn't able to rationalize much at that point.

It was midnight in Bangkok but only 11am at home.  My friends started to text me on the ipad - slight side note... how amazing is technology that with my ipad I can text my best friends on their iphones at home and have a real time conversation whenever I was for free. And it's convenient.  Amazing... - Anyway.  My friends spoke such truth and perspective to me.  I calmed down, and they made me laugh a lot. And I told Jen that I really wanted eggs for breakfast...

By the time I changed my ticket and talked with them for awhile  I only had a couple of hours to wait and see if I got on the standby flight. As I sat across from the check-in counter a woman came and asked if she could sit next to me.  I could tell by her accent that she was from North America.  She was older, and had a hiking backpack on.  I asked if she was coming in to Thailand, or flying out - and we had a great conversation.  

Her name was Jan.  She was from Arizona and she was meeting up with her friend so they could go hiking in Nepal.  She said since her kids were grown she had to figure out where she belonged in her next season.  She missed traveling, so she's traveling. I loved it! She encouraged me in what I was doing.  She told me that Eleanor Roosevelt had said, "Do something that scares you everyday." I assured her I had completed that task for the day. As it came time for me to check on my flight she hugged me and wished me luck, and told me not to believe myself when I said I was scared.  If I was really scared, I would have never come.

I went up to the ticket counter and they had one seat left of the flight to Chiang Mai at 8am. And guess who got it.

This girl.

I had to sprint to my gate, but I made the flight and guess what they served for breakfast on the one hour flight? Egg sandwiches! With fresh fruit and the most delicious yogurt... it was awesome.

I got into Chiang Mai and called Emmi.  Someone picked me up at the airport and dropped me off at the Lighthouse in Action Guesthouse.  The girls who were supposed to let me in had just got up to 7-Eleven.  The taxi driver and girl who picked me up told me not to worry, just to wait.  And they left.

So there i was in Thailand by myself.  My luggage sitting in the dirt outside of a locked gate. I don't speak the language, I don't have a phone, and I had no idea where I was.  Talk about living in Faith.  All I could do was pray that Jesus had a plan n this.

A few minutes later two girls came to let me in.  They were really nice.  They showed me where my room was and made sure I didn't have any questions.  They said they had to leave, but would be back to following night.  All of the Lighthouse team had gone on retreat for the weekend.  So here I sit in this big building with 9 bedrooms, two sitting areas, and an outdoor kitchen all by myself.

God is forcing me to sit and rest in Him.  For Him to show me that He is enough.  I don't need other people around me.  It's great when they're there - and I TOTALLY appreciate the people in my life.

But He is enough.

I can do nothing without Him here.  There's really no reason for me to be in Thailand unless I am going to rely on Him completely.  For everything. All day.  

So I slept for 17 hours last night.  I'm over jet lag.  I have no idea what day it is.  In my head it feels like it should be Thursday.  But it's Saturday morning.  It feels like it's afternoon. but it's only 9:30am.  I'll catch on.  

But for now. I am just trusting in Him.